What would you say to a friend who constantly critisizes your parenting, but does an awful job herself?

A 'friend' of mine constantly critisizes my parenting choices, from discipline to what my kids wear, plus makes smart comments all the time if my house is messy, or I'm wearing grubbies. Her house is constantly filthy, and she's usually dressed up because someone else is watching her kids for her! What can I say to make a point but not be rude?What would you say to a friend who constantly critisizes your parenting, but does an awful job herself?
Is your friend a particular family member of mine? Lol!!!


I think probaly every single person in the world knows someone like this, I don't know why people do it! It always seems to me like the people who have the least room to talk have the most to say. I'm guilty of not sticking up for myself enough with my family, if they critisize or 'question' things that I do I tend not to argue, but if they keep pushing that might change! When I have kids (in a few weeks I'll be fostering kids), I won't be taking any criticisms of them, especially since the person who does it the most was a pretty horrible mother to her own kids when they were little. If it's really starting to bother you, try saying ';that's fine, I don't really mind if my house is a bit messy, what I couldn't stand is if it got dirty (meaning like her house)';, or comments like that that gently point out that you don't really think much of her way of doing things either. If all else fails, start standing up to your friend! That's what I will do. Good luck and commiserations!What would you say to a friend who constantly critisizes your parenting, but does an awful job herself?
I'd tell her honestly that her constant criticism of your parenting and about you are putting a strain on your friendship. I'd ask her to exercise the same restraint that you have shown her.
Why don鈥檛 you say the same things about your friends house when you visit her?


Make comments and tell her how to keep her house straight and be sympathetic that her house it a lot is a lot messier even when she have maids to look after her kids. And then tell her that鈥檚 its a lot easier to preach than practice.





You can always ignore her comments. Let people say all they want. I鈥檓 sure that you know that you are doing the correct thing and the best you can.
I had a friend exactly like that when I was raising my now grown (and doing wonderful) kids. I pointed out to her one day that if she wasn't so busy pointing fingers at me, she would have more time to give her own kids some much needed attention... Believe me, it got the point across!!!!
If she is really your friend and you wish to keep it that way you might say something like, ';I am complimented that you feel comfortable enough to say something like that to me, but really, I can't imagine why you take such interest in the way I raise my children.'; (keep my house, etc.)





If you need to be a little more pointed, you might say, ';Tell you what: why don't we each keep our thoughts to ourselves about this kind of thing so that neither of us gets our feelings hurt?';





Next level: ';Honestly? I don't think you have a thing to teach me about that. Why don't we give this whole area of conversation a permanent rest?';





If you don't wish to remain ';friends';: ';I don't see how the way I raise my children is any of your business. Your opinion on this is not wanted or needed.';





If this person is persistent: ';Mind your own business. From the look of things over at your place, someone needs to for a change.';





Or, you might invoke the tried and true: ';Kiss my ***, twice. Buzz off.'; Easy to get your drift and and not so subtle that she could somehow overlook your point.
You don't say anything to HER. You say it to YOURSELF! And what you say is - ';GOSH! This is not my friend. I'm going to choose to spend my time elsewhere and with other people!';
If she's your friend than you can be straight forward with her. If she gets angry with you, then she's not worth hanging out with. I would just tell her while you respect her opinions, you would like it if she stopped being so critical of everything you do. (Besides usually people who constantly down others are compensating for their own short comings.)
I would distance myself from such a friend.
She is being rude. Be rude back. Tell her to stay the **** out of your business and get her own life in order.
I value your friendship but your constant criticism is driving me away. I won't badmouth your life if you don't badmouth mine.
Why even bother having a 'friend' like that at all.
';Don't give advice where it isn't wanted.'; or ';Practice what you preach.';
Well Theres a time and place to be rude and this is one of them. You could always do the childess comeback ;) ';I wouldnt be talking homie'; xD





Well good luck cause people like that(hypocryphs) bug me too! =)
Tell her ';That its great you are giving me advice, I think it is nice. But this is My house, and my children and I would like it if you would stop.';
Don't answer her rudeness by being rude yourself. You may just end up with an argument.





You can tell her flat out you think she is being rude. She is entitled to her opinion, but you do not wish to hear it any longer. After that, if she brings it up, you will probably need to just end the conversation by telling her that topic is not open for discussion with her.





Good luck!